Tuesday, September 17, 2013

Skyward Sword vs Twilight Princess: In-Game Partner



If we had to pick the WORST in-game partner of all time, that honor would go to Navi, the little fairy who'd annoy everyone with her "HEY LISTEN!" and "WATCH OUT!" whenever anything bad would happen.

But Navi's not up for the running here. The ones who are is a little imp, and the spirit of the Master Sword.

I've been starting with Twilight Princess a lot, so this time, let's start with Skyward Sword.

Fi is the spirit of the Goddess Sword, left by Hylia for her chosen hero long ago. She first appears to Link in a sort of vision when Zelda gets taken by an unnatural tornado. Later that night, Link follows her to the Goddess Statue where the Goddess Sword lays inside. Upon taking the sword, Link cements himself as the Goddesses Chosen Hero, and he's off to find and rescue Zelda.

Throughout his journey, Fi provides information about enemies and locations, providing stats about enemies you've defeated and occasional snarky comments. She also absorbs the three Goddess Flames in order to strengthen the Goddess Sword until it becomes the Master Sword. HOLY MACKERAL BIG SPOILERS! Fi falls into a permanent sleep after defeating Demise, her mission now over.

Despite having all this knowledge about enemies, Fi refuses to disclose all of it until an enemy has defeated you. Apparently, she doesn't realize that the enemy at hand is killing you, and advice regarding its defeat would be MOST APPRECIATED!

Fi's presence also confuses me. Does everyone else see her? Or does just Link see her? The game never really made that clear to me. Because Fi will react to a piece of information, but no one reacts to a freakin' girl materializing out of a sword hilt! I mean, come on.

Fi's personality just irritates me as well. While she's not annoying like Navi, she remains stiff and formal all the time. And while her parting lines are tear-jerking, they're nowhere near as powerful as Midna's final lines, or even other character final lines! She may say the data she's collected is the most precious on record, but she's never going to awaken again and know if any of the other Links are just as good or better of a master than the first one. Alternatley, you could take it as the first Link will always be her master...but I'm getting into too much speculation.

Midna's turn!

Midna is a funny little imp that you meet right after you transform into a wolf for the first time. She mocks your condition and then fails to properly remove a manacle from your leg, and then she abandons you for a time in the dungeons while the creepy Twilit Rats are chasing you! And then she basically recruits you to be her slave to get her Fused Shadows for her because she's too lazy to navigate the dungeons herself.

And then Zant happens. Rather than joining with a fellow Twili, she refuses to join him and to punish her for her "disloyalty" he summons Lanayru and blasts Midna with the light.

Link rescues Midna via Princess Zelda, and from then on, Midna is a different person. She's still snarky, but you feel less used and more like you're actually working together.

In the end, it turns out Midna is the Twilight Princess the game is named for, and it turns out Zant is the reason Midna's stuck as an imp. Midna turns back into her regular form, and then, just as she's heading back to the Twilight Realm, she breaks the Mirror of Twilight so that nothing bad can happen in Hyrule again.

Holy Crap Midna is awesome. The minute she enters the game she just steals the show. Midna also has an active role in the story. Not only is she your guide, but she teleports you around Hyrule. And seriously, that makes the game so much easier when you can just teleport to a location instead of having to walk/ride your horse there. Midna also has serious character development, and it makes her one of the greatest characters in gaming I've ever encountered. She goes from helping only herself and only worrying about herself and her kingdom, to worrying about the well-being of others and those in Hyrule.

When she shatters the Mirror, I always felt like she was saying, "No matter what troubles may come, I know it won't come from my world. What happened her will not happen again."

Really, Midna felt more like an actual person than Fi ever did. Fi always felt like a tool, which, I kind of get she was, but she could have had a lot more characterization, and it just bothered me how, really, Fi wasn't super helpful. Honestly, after coming fresh off of Midna, I felt like Fi just...sucked.

All in game partners need to be held to the standard of characterization that Midna had. Especially if at the end of the game they leave you. That needs to be a super sad moment.

So the Twilight Princess wins this round.

Skyward Sword: 2
Twilight Princess: 1

Tuesday, September 10, 2013

Chapter 3: Terrible Three's

Her youth permanently assured for as long as she likes, Roxanne wastes no time in schmoozing her maid (yeah, she doesn't care like that)
 
We'll leave them be for now...
 

 
 
Oh, okay...Roxanne is wondering if she should start to see a doctor about the baby chimes she keeps hearing. It's starting to disturb her a little...
 
Anyways, deciding that it's time to get back to parenting, she starts to teach Max how to walk.
 
 
By the time night falls, Max has this walking thing figured out.

 
And Roxie's starting to have a familiar but unpleasant sensation...
 
You're supposed to go in the toilet, not through it! Also, why'd you go to the boys' room? Yours is right there!
 
Roxanne screwy logic aside, it's time for some birthdays! YAY! Andrew and Alexa are about to enter the world of hormones and Roxanne is bracing herself for the worst. Max on the other hand, is just content to sit in his high chair.
 
I find it funny our new maid is more enthusiastic than anyone in the family.
 
Have you ever heard of Murphy's Law? You know, the "anything that can go wrong will go wrong?" Yeah...it happens.

Apparently Roxanne ordered the especially flammable flavor.
 
Typical of boys and his soon to be teen status, Andrew doesn't mind the flames in the background. He thinks it's cool.

Such a boy...
 
Max, on the other hand, is totally oblivious that he could have potentially been an orphan and he's content to sit in his super gross high chair. Maid lady! Clean it!

 
The flames die down, and amid the chaos, Andrew ages up.
 
Roxanne is kind of freaking out now that her little boy is now...a big boy.
 
Alexa's cake goes much better than her brother's.

 
I won't say much about her fashion sense, but Alexa's quite the lady now.
Actually, she doesn't look half bad for randomly generated clothes.
 
 This next part is one of my favorite moments ever. After finishing his cake, Andrew picks up his little brother and plays with him...


 
And then goes and cleans his messy high chair. I didn't tell him to do any of this. Andrew did it of his own free will.
 
 
 
BUT WAIT THERE'S MORE! Not only is it the twins' birthday, it's Max's as well! PARTY IN THE HOW-SE!
I think Roxanne had to make a quick bathroom break between kids. You know how morning sickness is...
 
So here's some snapshots of the kids all grow'd up!
 
Alexa
I think she was blinking here. But she also has very narrow eyes.
 
Andrew
Also, I'm apologizing in advance because, you're gonna see this hairstyle a lot. I don't have many expansions. My poor computer can't handle it. One day it might...
 
Max
Seriously, I think he's one of the most attractive children Roxanne has had. (wait until he grows up! ;)
 
Hey guess what happened while everyone was posing for the creator's picture-fest?!
 
If you guessed rampaging llamas, you're right! Oh wait, never mind...
 
You guessed it! Roxanne is expecting once again! (And if you didn't, what are you doing here? This is a hundred baby challenge after all...)
 
Now that the kids are older, Roxanne feels a lot more comfortable telling her oldest two she's expecting again.
 
She thinks her oldest daughter is an excellent first choice.
 
"Alexa, I'm pregnant!"
"Oh! So that's why you're wearing the ugly sheep nightgown."
"...Shut up, it's the only thing that fits."

 
While that didn't go over as smoothly as she would have liked, Roxanne decides to flaunt her belly in style. That's right...
Pregnant Lady on a Motorcyle
 
Despite the fact she's had three children already, Roxanne decides to reread some of the pregnancy books. She also is getting a sense that there's definitely more than one baby inside.
 
After a trip to the day spa, Roxanne decides to do some bonding with her daughter.

 
Max, on the other hand, has been worried that his mom is getting fat for some odd reason. Instead she tells him that that there's a little brother or sister in there. Potentially both, she's pretty sure it's multiples.
"So there's a baby in there?"
"Bab-ies."
"Well, how'd they get in there?"
"Uh..."
 
Awkward questions aside, Roxanne manages to distract Max long enough to evade the question and Andrew and Alexa take over in the watching children department.
 
The family that games together...(Sorry Andrew!)
 
Roxanne moves upstairs to do some dancing, as it's the only physical exercise she feels comfortable doing this far along in her pregnancy.
 


 
The older kids tire of the games, and Alexa decides to do some reading while her brothers watch sports.


 I love how Alexa and Andrew sit together. Although poor Max in the back...

Before the kids get home from school, Roxanne goes into labor again.
 
 
She decides to have the babies born here at home. After all, she's had three already. How bad could this one be?
 
She had to ask. Alexa and Andrew don't take well to pregnancy and proceed to freak out.
 
"Mom! Shouldn't you be at the hospital?!"
"Do we need to get hot water?!"
"I don't know, I've never had a baby, you nutjob!"


After freaking out for about two minutes the twins decide they have better things to do than assist in the birth of their younger siblings.

"Mom, it's great you're having a baby and all, but we're gonna go do homework now."
 
Max reacts much like his teen siblings did.

"This is the part where the baby comes out?! I thought there was magic involved in it!"

Here's one...
 
Two...

Max was sort of right...there are sparkles involved.

And here's three. Roxanne discovered she was woefully underprepared for triplets, so she had a nursery built off of the girls' room.

I apologize in advance, readers, because you're going to see this room A LOT.

D'awwww!

Not sure which baby this is...when they're this small I can never remember.

Meet Bianca, Beckham and Bertram.

Bianca
It appears that the green hair must be a girl only trait...
 
Beckham
He likes to be shirtless. Shirts are for wimps and girls.

Bertram
 
I figure I'll end here with a cutesy picture of the boys playing with tanks.

Boys will be boys...
 
I'm finally glad we got this chapter done. More craziness and babies are to follow! Stay tuned!